Sarah’s Story
I don’t remember a specific moment in time when I fell in love with horses. It feels as much a part of me as my arms or my legs. I have no memory of my life without this love being present in my heart. Looking back, I believe this love for horses also fueled a love of learning. Growing up in a big city, with minimal access to the animals I loved, I read every horse book in the library and kept a huge herd of Breyer horses in my bedroom. My reading gave me new ideas to ponder, new places to explore, fed my passion for horses and fueled a vivid imagination. I believe it kept my heart connection intact during some difficult adolescent years. It was a slow burning ember I carried deep within, even as school, church and family were trying to mold me into an acceptable, responsible, domesticated member of society. Only with a few close friends, did I ever feel that I could be my true self.
Learning to hide my true self and present a more “acceptable” persona, was something I struggled with for many years, yet after a time, that incongruence became my new normal. After college and a thankfully short marriage, I brought my first horse! Apollo was a handsome 6-year-old Quarter Horse who spent the next 23 years being a patient teacher, guiding me back to my true, authentic self and helping expand my awareness on many different levels.
While Apollo was a dream come true, he was also my biggest frustration. Everything I thought I “knew” about horses did nothing help me bring about the relationship I longed for with my horse. I did not see at the time, how my incongruence made him feel unsafe, that he could clearly feel the emotions I buried. Apollo was my mirror, and I didn’t like what I was seeing or even know what to do about it.
Always searching, I found a clue on the shelves of my favorite bookstore. Reading The Tao of Equus by Linda Kohanov was the beginning of many life-changing events for me and Apollo. On a crazy whim, I applied for Linda’s apprenticeship program. In 2004 I graduated as an EponaQuest Equine Facilitated Learning Instructor. I then sold my farm, left a long-term relationship, loaded up my 3 horses, cats and dogs and moved to Tucson Arizona. The tools I learned, and then learned how to teach were exactly what I needed to begin a new and beautiful relationship with myself AND my horses. Living in a community with like-minded friends and horses, I had a continuous learning environment that taught me how to live authentically again, how to feel my emotions and then to find the value in the information they provided. I learned to be present, more aware and less controlling. I discovered that incredible change and growth can happen when we step outside our comfort zones.
The six years I spent in Tucson were rich in friendships, growth, learning and many new experiences. The beautiful desert environment was a catalyst for my healing journey. This was enhanced by opportunities to delve into many different healing modalities such as Network Spinal Analysis, Rebirthing and Holotropic Breathwork, Cranial Sacral, Hypnosis, and Psych-K to name a few. I was also exploring a similar terrain with my horses, how to provide species appropriate diet and living environments, natural hoof care and trimming, chiropractic, as well as alternative and kinder training modalities.
I started taking classes and graduated in 2009 as an Equine Structural Integration Practitioner (a modality also known as Rolfing). In 2010 I become an Advanced EponaQuest Instructor.
Photo by Greta Ingvalson
In 2011, I took all this growth and learning, along with my horses, dogs and cats, back to my beloved farm in Brownsville, MN. I didn’t want to leave the desert and sunshine that I loved but I was feeling a strong pull from the land that I once lived on. A series of coincidences led me back as soon as I opened my heart to the possibility of returning to Minnesota. Apollo in now buried on this land along with Agent and Riley and Goldie. All of whom showed up in my life as teachers and facilitators, helping and guiding me and many others toward living a heart-forward, authentic life.
I have always dreamed of a creating a healing sanctuary on this land and I feel that the land is also dreaming this into reality with me. Of course, my herd and other farm animals are an integral part of the healing energy and work that is done here, but the natural world also offers up her gifts. Connecting with nature brings benefits and healing and I have so much gratitude for these gifts. Expanding my awareness to the plant being, the wild animals and birds, the earth and the elements, all strengthen my heart connection. I can feel the interconnectedness and interdependence we have with all living beings. As we heal ourselves, we can help others heal. This includes the earth and nature! Our hearts and souls have been domesticated from an early age, I have found healing in the re-wilding of my heart and soul and this is the basis for the gifts I bring forward to share.
Photo by Greta Ingvalson
2023 is the manifestation of Gift it Forward Farm and I hope you will join me in this healing and re-wilding sanctuary. We are stronger together and the world needs each and every one of our unique and beautiful gifts.
